Monthly Archives: March 2014

Online dating profile: Version 5.0? 12.0?

(this is part of a series of entries that I simply copy and paste the text “as is” from my profile on some crappy online dating website. I will try to update my profile on a weekly basis and see what happens. Let’s see what resonates with people out there.)

Well…there are profiles that will get you a “good’ol” boyfriend who will introduce you to his family, who will fall in love with you, who will buy you that unnecessarily expensive diamond ring…and so on.

I’m assuming the tone of those profiles is mostly sweet and subliminally submissive. They probably appeal, in a very unthreatening manner, to the un-/subconscious male pathos, that…let’s be honest…even in 2014 is always striving to be the Alpha personality in the room. And there is nothing wrong with that…because ladies let’s be honest…we enjoy that thoroughly.

Then…there are profiles like mine. A pure stream of consciousness, devoid of any desire to actually connect with somebody, while in the same time, craving the potential praise for the creativity and uncanny resonance it causes in well…human beings.

I’ll be honest, that I’ve been deliberately playing around with different ways of projecting my personality to the cyber-online-dating-world. Mostly out of fun, and also because of my curious and inquisitive nature.

Or maybe, I’m just a pain in the ass, really!

I’m not advertising my blog here (online dating world), but my stuff is certainly being read more frequently, and by more people, here than anywhere else.

Yes, boys and girls, I am force feeding you my poorly phrased sentences and horribly structured essays. Most likely written while stumbling my way to Bacchus monopolized lands…

Let me get back to my not-so-sweet, not-so-subliminally submissive, blah blah blah personality. Alright! Maybe, I am too “tomboyish”, with my callused hands from crossfit and climbing (oh…and pole dancing), way too flirtatious, definitely an alpha personality, blah blah blah…but…

There is something quite shitty about a girl/woman who’s carefully summoning her sweet powers, and submissive prowess as she seduces the boy across the table from her (assuming they moved their conversation from online to F2F). All this while she plans the next 5 to 10 years of her life with said boy…things like…how big the diamond ring will be, that big wedding she wants so bad, how many children, and the like (ALL ON THE FIRST FEW DATES)…to the complete “ignorance” of poor little boy, who probably just wants to get laid.

When that happens my online dating friends, I’m not sure I want to be that sweet girl, if you know what I mean.

Just kidding! I am not that cynical. But sadly, it does happen.

I’ve considered writing a very sexually-inclined profile, with pictures of me on the pole (which, if I may add, are pretty hot), without any intellectual subtleties, just to see the kinds of guys who respond.

The latter profile falls somewhere on the spectrum of skillfully manipulating the male pathos. It works! And let me tell you…probably better than the “sweet, subdued” personalities. Especially if my goal was to “get laid”, which coincidentally aligns well with the boys primitive motivation. Oh please! Don’t roll your eyes, or stare at the screen like I just said something horrible.

Why do you think a lot of girls spend hours in front of the mirror adjusting that low-cut top, which strategically shows just enough cleavage and part of her blood red bra?

Or the ones that go all the way, and wear low cut jeans, that are so low cut, you can probably see their entire G-string underwear that has that sparkle you can’t take your eyes off of? Underwear? Wut? Forget the underwear…and wear a dress…and let the guy know.

I have a friend that does this very well. I am actually copying some of that “brilliance”, and the sad part is…it yields results. May not be the types of guys I’m looking for…but it works.

ahahahahaha sorry!

So conclusion is…guys either like sweet girls or complete sluts! ahahahah

I AM ONLY KIDDING!

I seriously hope we are a tad more complex than that.

But I definitely do not fall in the “belly” of that bell curve. And, I’m not so sure anymore it is a good thing.

 

 


Online dating…third week and already contemplating the end…

(this is part of a series of entries that I simply copy and paste the text “as is” from my profile on some crappy online dating website. I will try to update my profile on a weekly basis and see what happens. Let’s see what resonates with people out there.)

(yet another update…I feel like they’re getting more and more deflated.)

Self-summary:

Let’s try this again… 🙂

I don’t think you REALLY want to read my self-summary. It’s similar to when you ask somebody “How are you?”, but you’re not really expecting a real response, just a “Great”.

Self-summaries are better in person.

I spend a lot of time thinking about:

Quite a few things, but of relevance to this site.
What will be the next iteration of my profile? (yes, I am always changing the text here. It’s very interesting to see what resonates with people. Although, if you’re anything like me, you go straight to height and pictures first. Shallow much? 🙂 I’m human

(that’s it! So tiring)

Side note (and unrelated to my profile narrative): Just yesterday I had a spontaneous hang out with a pretty awesome guy. I mean…really hot! Really open, sweet, “troublemaker”(ish), moves like cat and monkey at times, smells soooo good, hugged me the whole night, put his head on my lap…we had pretty fun (and funny) conversations, and I even helped him come up with his TEDx talk. That’s right! TEDx

All of this happened at the infamous rock gym. He’s a friend who I reconnected with recently. When he first saw me at the gym yesterday, he practically dove into me, and we rolled on the floor like two kids! Seriously! How awesome is it that something like that happens in 2014? Two adults, who just simply don’t care about the dozens/hundreds of people around them…aahahahahah What a fun night!


The Online-dating Single Girl Saga

(this is part of a series of entries that I simply copy and paste the text “as is” from my profile on some crappy online dating website. I will try to update my profile on a weekly basis and see what happens. Let’s see what resonates with people out there.)

<latest profile update on some online dating website> tsk tsk tsk

Hi folks!

As promised, I will be updating this profile from time to time. I get bored of reading the same text over and over again. I know OKC is not a blog, but I will make it so (tsk tsk tsk reminds me of Star Trek :o)

Online dating BLOGGY STYLE 😀

The exposure you get from adding your information and pictures in this thing can get a bit strange, comic, and sometimes creepy. For instance, today I was happily climbing at a gym. I was in such an awesome mood today…feeling relaxed…accomplished…a bit flirtatious. The gym was a bit crowded, the music just loud enough so that you could block it out for concentration, and invite it in for some head bobbing…or who knows…even twerking (not that I did it or anything).

Then, all of a sudden, I felt the urge to look right behind me. It was like a serious gravitational pull. Do you know that unexplainable feeling that you get when somebody is seriously staring at you? Yes, that! So I turned around to see what was UP! Hummm…well…there was somebody indeed looking at me…somebody who looked VERY familiar, but whose face I couldn’t exactly place.

Very puzzled, and still drawn to the familiarity of the face, I turned to the “cave”, ruminated on which boulder problem to tackle, and off I went. Yes! I finished it! Climbed down, and turned EXACTLY to the same familiar male face.

Shit! Of course I know that face. It’s the OKC guy who has been checking my profile every single day, and not messaging me <which I find very strange, and makes me think that it’s his way of prompting me to say “hello”??? his version of “playing hard to get”???>.

I was kind of laughing inside, and a bit disconcerted. So I pretended to be really interested in that boulder problem all the way across the room! ahahahah

As I’m walking to the other side…I kid you not, I saw one more person that is on here in OKC, and has actually initiated contact. So so so strange, and what a small, coincident world it is!

1- I think I may have had two surprise “dates” tonight

2- I guess when you’re on here + there’s any mention of climbing on your profile + you de facto climb = you will run into these situations.

3- I am seriously considering canceling my account yet once again (this time in less than the usual 2 months). I figure, hey, if I’m running into these guys (who seem nice I guess…) I can just approach them the regular old fashioned way…like “Hi! How are you?”. Even easier when you’re climbing “Nice job! You flashed that problem, how did you go from that gaston, to the dyno, to upside down…etc” <yes, this guy I’m talking to has super climbing powers. It’s my imagination, so thank you for not spoiling it!>

That’s all I have for now.


Single and online dating

(this is part of a series of entries that I simply copy and paste the text “as is” from my profile on some crappy online dating website. I will try to update my profile on a weekly basis and see what happens. Let’s see what resonates with people out there.)

It has been wayyyyyy toooo loooonnnggg since I posted something here. It’s a mix of being busy, and just lazy!

What follows below is what I wrote for my profile for an online dating website. I think this whole thing is…is…well…less than ideal. Based on what I’ve heard from friends, observed, and experienced myself, online dating is a very easy way to hook up. Especially the free ones…like the one I am using! ahahahah It’s also rendering boys and girls almost inept to know how to flirt, or recognize flirting anymore. Why would they? There’s no need…go home, check your “inbox” and there will be a line of dates waiting for you.

Alas! I cannot keep going against the current on this one. It’s safe to say that 85-95% of people in my age range date this way. So from time to time, I play with it. As an experiment, I’m going to start writing my profile “blog style”, and will start adding the most outrageous shit, just to see the reaction.

I have quite a lot to say about the dynamics and things like “playing hard to get” in online dating. I will add posts later.

WTF?! 🙂 Really?

Enjoy!

(“Tell me about yourself:

If I were you, I’d skip this whole section. Consider yourself warned.

Third time I have reactivated/reopened my account. It goes something like this:

1- I try this thing for 1 to 2 months to realize it’s not for me. I prefer the visceral face-to-face flirting and randomly meeting people

2- Next, I cancel my profile

3- Then, I question “why am I always going against the grain?”

(I find full bearded men to be pretty awesome) <here is where I’ll start adding off the wall commentary to get a reaction>

4- I feel quite comfortable in that place (#3)…while also flexing my flirting muscles. Side note: Always very interesting to flirt in an “online dating” saturated world. Ah…the long lost art of flirting…

5- I travel a lot, hang out a lot, play hard, oh yes…and work a lot too (kind of ongoing)

(Strong callused hands are nice.)

6- My friends continue to question my rebellion against the binary code dating scene

7- Meanwhile, I’m still delighting myself in #s 3, 4, and 5

8- One of my friends comes over with a bottle of wine, and tells me about Tinder. Tinder what? I ask. Very excited, she proceeds to show me.

We spend the next several minutes on her phone, flipping through the pictures of dozens of guys who live within a 100-mile radius of her zip code. While sipping a few glasses of wine.

(I like adding interesting facts to this thing) <ok…this is the first version of this experiment. Version 2.0 will probably have some wildly explicit text>

Our selection process involves spending half of a second on each picture, then swiping to the next picture.

We had the occasional “oopsie” moments, followed by lots of giggling. The backwards swipes that were simple finger twitches, and not necessarily a love declaration. And the forward slides that were meant for a “coffee/beer date”, and which we tried to bring back to her phone screen with that backwards slide, to realize that “backwards” in Tinder, is not the same as the “<–” on a browser…even worse…we had just “liked” a butt naked guy for a conversation. I’m sure my friend will enjoy our mistakes…

I am not usually this cruel. I promise.

(I have a pole in my house, that I haven’t used in a while since I hurt my shoulder)

I digress…

Where did I stop? #8…

Playing Tinder on my friend’s phone was entertaining. My friend encouraged me to sign up, but I guess you need a facebook page, which I also cancelled a few months ago. So…yes…not happening. Besides, I saw a lot of the same people there as here…what a small world. :o)

(I might be moving to Colorado in a few months)

9- I decided to swim with the currents for now so I rejoined OKC. It is faster right?

I’m really good at:

Day dreaming that I am an awesome climber, dancer, crossfitter, quadrupedal “mover”, shredding guitar player with an amazing voice, humanitarian philanthropist.

And then working hard on refining my skills to get closer to above-mentioned sur/Realistic dreams. (All but guitar playing 😦 one day…one day)

On a typical Friday night I am:

Everywhere and nowhere. Yes, right there.

Lately? Traveling somewhere for work or fun or both…asking my friends to flip through their Tinder profiles while under the influence to see if I backward swipe more often.

Getting really good at packing efficiently

The most private thing I’m willing to admit: ——> SERIOUSLY?

Absolutely not! 🙂

You should message me if: 

you want to. Why else? 🙂

) THE END